Well, I'm taking this change thing on the road. I'm on my first official gig after losing Mom. It's been just over 3 months since she left this mortal coil and I am still adapting to my new self. Operation Flashy Jacket has finally started in earnest. 12 pounds down and counting! When I returned to New York I tried to start about one thousand new projects all on the same day. Losing weight, organizing my life, finding the perfect life mate and becoming the woman my Mother always wanted me to be. Of course, all of this project piling left me feeling depleted, defeated and down right destroyed. I'm hear to tell you folks, it's impossible to lose 100 pounds, start a relationship and restructure your life in ONE DAY. Shocking I know!
So, I took a little time to make a few little changes at a time. Firstly, leaving the house. Not as easy as one would imagine. Secondly, packing for a gig. Truly daunting this time. All of my clothes seemed to have turned against me and my well oiled packing machine apparently was in the shop. Thirdly, getting on the damn plane. As I walked through the airport I just knew someone was going to stop and ask me what was wrong. Strangely, I was shocked when they didn't. Can't you people see that I'm different? Yes, my fellow TSA friends, it's not the same Melissa Parks that you usually torment with your inefficient and intrusive ways. I'm not the same. I feel like my grief is tattooed on my skin for all to see. But it isn't. No one knows. In one way I'm grateful for that, in another I want to shout it from the rooftops. There is no rhyme or reason to this strange little dance we call grief.
Salt Lake City greeted me with snow showers. Now it's almost 80. I love this ever changing weather. It's much like my mood...snowy one day and sunny the next. Such is life. The production looks wonderful and the cast is witty and very talented. It's good to be back in the swing of things. My voice still sounds like an alien to me. I swear it's changed in timbre. I think for the better. After all, swords forged by fire are always the sharpest.
~Mel
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