Make a joyful noise...

Well, dear readers I'm off to my first coaching since my return to New York.  I'm so grateful that I will be able to see my coach before he heads off to a gig for many weeks.  He and I have been through the fire together and he always gives me a new perspective to chew on.  I look forward to the inspiration.  One little problem though, I'm not inspired at all.  I have not sung since a memorial service I did in El Paso before I returned home.  I have no issue singing at funerals.  I've done it since I was 15.  In college I was on the funeral list at the local funeral home.  Many people want music at a service and don't have have musicians in their lives so they rely on the home to find someone.  Therein comes the list.  Often times I would sing from the back of the room and not even meet the family at hand.  I knew the impact the music had on them and it was my great pleasure to contribute, even just a bit, to easing their pain on one of the most bone breakingly difficult days of their lives.

I cannot seem to find my voice in all of the hullabaloo of recent days.  It seems like an alien has taken up residence in my throat and someone else's tones are coming out of my mouth.  My body feels tight and over inflated with air that I just can't seem to access.  It's a frustrating feeling and yet I can't seem to DO anything about it.  It is what it is.  I'm looking for that warm blanket of a friend to emit it's familiar stream of melody and it seems she has left me high and dry.  What comes out is a passionless product of years of study and discipline.  Utterly under passioned and flat in intent.

As quickly as the ennui has settled in is how quickly it can change to a little spark.  Sometimes we have to trog through things to find that spark.  Sometimes the spark is simply made by the friction of DOING that very thing we just cannot seem to find the inspiration to do.  Dusting off the cobwebs and embracing the task, no matter how lackluster the first result, the hope of finding ones voice again is too precious to let drop.  Whether your voice is in your writing, or calling a friend you haven't spoken too in a while, asking for that promotion or just trying not to hate your job.  Slugging it out with the blue meanies is a an important part of existence.  It adds those little notches to our heavenly crowns giving us the opportunity to truly be inspired and most noble of all....to inspire others.

I once had someone tell me to "sing the color of the sky".  Well, today it is a clarion blue and I will do my best to try to infuse that majestic color into my meager squeaks today.  After all it says to "Make a joyful noise unto the Lord"....not make a beautiful well produced, perfectly placed and supported, mind blowing sound unto the Lord.  So today I'll start with a few noises.  Tomorrow I'll try to make a few more.  My muse hasn't left me, she's just taking a vacation.  I hope she arrives back fully rested with new energy and inspiration.

May your day be inspired dear friends!

Love,
~Mel